Hey! It's me again.
This is a very special day. This is day 756...
of my college experience...
otherwise known as... graduation day!
Whoo! Ah!
Wait for it. I got the whole outfit.
I have been planning for this day for my entire life.
Um, when I was a kid, I devised this plan...
that I cleverly called "The Plan. "
Uh, " Dad can't make it to graduation today.
Big shocker.
Can I join you guys for lunch?"
Absolutely.
This is great, because nobody runs parental interference quite like Adam.
We've been best friends since freshman year.
# This is Ryden's study song #
# I worked on it so damn long #
# It's to give encouragement #
# For your big test today #
Anyway, the plan is pretty straightforward.
One, kick ass in high school...
so that I can get... two... a fatty scholarship.
Three, limit my beer pong enough...
to keep said scholarship, which I did, and...
Oh.
Hi, Ryden. Jessica Bard here.
Just wanted to clean the slate.
I'm sorry I nabbed valedictorian...
but you have to believe I will do an excellent job.
Jessica Bard... my own personal Darth Vader since the third grade.
Back to the master plan.
Number four. Most importantly...
land a sweet job at the finest publishing house in all of L. A...
Happerman & Browning, where I will no doubt...
discover the next great American novel.
All right. So that's the plan. This is it.
Malby signing off, about to embark on the first day of the rest of my life.
And, hey, if you're at graduation, come say hi.
I'll be the one in black. Bye!
# You stumble down a yellow brick road #
# Spinning your shoes in the air#
# The air#
# Then you hold your breath and count to nine #
# Hoping that soon somebody will find you #
# Find you #
# Go on, go on, go on #
# The stars are watching #
# Just say, just say, just say #
# What you're feeling #
# You know, you know, you know #
# You gotta take a bow and do it your way #
# It's okay-ay #
# La-dada, da-dada, da-dada #
# It's okay-ay #
- # La-dada, da-dada, da-dada ## - Please welcome your class valedictorian...
Jessica Bard, with tonight's keynote address.
All right, Jessica!
Rock on, Jessie!
Class of 2009, it is my great honor...
to welcome you to this evening's graduation ceremony.
I stand before you with two age-old words: Carpe diem.
When we walk out these doors...
I challenge each of us to not only seize the day...
but to clutch it with both hands.
- You go first. - To squeeze it...
- Shh! - with all your strength.
And drain every last...
- living, breathing... - Could you move down a little?
victorious moment out of it.
Like when a Trojan decides...
...to plunge his blade into the beating heart ofhis enemy. -
He realizes it's not for his own personal glory.
- He does it for the better good of the community as a whole. -
- We must remember that our generation is smarter... -
- stronger and better equipped than... - Ma'am! Could you keep it down?
...any of those that came before us.
- And now... - I'm dying.
it is our responsibility...
to forge ahead and stake our rightful claim at the top.
- You know what? This calls for a toast. - Mm-hmm.
- What do you say, huh? Glasses up. - Hear, hear. Yes.
- To Ryden. - To Ryden.
- Who I'm very proud of.
Mmm. And to Adam.
The A-Man, who's here because we like him.
He's also here because his dad was too busy to come...
and, uh, his mom couldn't come because, um...
'cause she's dead and...
- Hear, hear. - Cheers.
- Yeah. - To your dead mother.
- Hmm. Cheers. - Cheers.
Anyway, honey, now that you're out there looking for a job...
maybe you, uh, you know, come down and work with me.
Uh, she's already got something lined up.
Tell 'em about the big interview.
At Happerman & Browning, Monday at 10:00.
- Wow! - Hey!
And my thesis adviser is best friends with the chief editor...
and has already put in a good word and everything.
And they are building these loft apartments...
like a block away from the offices, so...
They have these sweeping city views. I could walk to work.
Didn't I tell you?
What do you see over there?
What do you see right here on this wall?
Uh, white paint.
- Bookshelves! - Oh.
All my babies, floor to ceiling, organized by title.
- No, by author. No, by genre. - Okay. Settle down.
It's amazing. I'll take it.
- Really? - Really?
Yes! I can feel it. It's everything I ever imagined.
Hello? I love it.
Here. I've already filled out the application.
All right then. I'll need a check for first and last month's rent...
plus security deposit, so $3,500.
Done and done.
Uh... Hey, don't you think...
you're getting a little ahead of yourself there, killer?
No. No, I don't. I will have enough money soon.
Okay, well, right here you wrote "Happerman & Browning" under "employer"...
but you're not actually an employee of them.
In a couple of hours, that will be true too, so...
Maybe.
Here you go.
Thank you so much.
I'm hoping to start moving my stuff in on Saturday.
Just as soon as I call your references. And your check clears.
# Wake up, wake up wake the sun #
# Wake up, wake up hanging like... ##
Are we okay? Do we have enough time?
Don't worry. We got plenty of time.
Hey, what's up with Columbia? Did you hear back yet?
Uh, big envelope, so... I don't know. I guess I got in.
Wait. Adam. You might've gotten into law school...
and you haven't even opened the envelope yet?
The shrug? Adam, you know how I feel about the shrug.
Another shrug? Adam. I got the double shrug?
Hey, this is your day, okay?
Shit!
- Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. - Okay. No, calm down. Calm down.
- You just calm down. - Oh... My car! He killed my car!
No!
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no. - No, calm down.
His insurance will pay for it.
- Uh! Look... - It's fine. I'll take...
- Oh, shit. - Shit.
- Yes? - Happerman & Browning offices?
Uh, yes. Eighteenth floor.
- Okay. - Uh, uh... Excuse me, ma'am.
You got something going on right here.
Oh!
- Thanks. - Sure.
Happerman & Browning. Please hold.
Happerman & Browning. Yes, at 4:00. Thank you.
Happerman & Browning. Please hold.
Hi. I'm Ryden Malby. I have an interview with Barbara Snaff at 10:00.
Yeah. We're actually running about two hours behind...
so just fill this out and have a seat with the rest of the applicants, hmm?
Happerman & Browning.
Yes, at 4:00. Thank you.
Sorry.
Yes, Miss Snaff. Right away.
Stacy Moore?
Joe Schrader?
Caroline Hirsch.
Jeffrey Beales? Kimberly Rice? Beth Brandon.
BarryJenkins. Gregory O'Bryant?
Ryden Malby?
Hello.
- Please. Take a seat. - Thank you.
All right. You... You just graduated, yes?
- Yes, I... - Major?
- English, with an emphasis... - Minor?
- Communications. - Internships?
I actually did three internships... Penguin, Random House...
And Time Warner.
So, why do you want this job?
Because... this is not just a job to me.
This is... This is what I love. This is what I'm good at.
When I was 11, at summer camp, all the other kids would go down to the lake...
and I would be finishing Catcher in the Rye...
'cause I couldn't get enough of Holden Caulfield.
And at 13, Bukowski's Post Office...
the most explicit, inappropriate thing I'd ever come across.
It was like sex ed, except awesomely foul-mouthed.
Well, I guess what I'm getting at is that books are all I know...
and everything I love, and...
I want this job because...
well, because I can't imagine ever doing anything else.
All right. Good. Thank you for coming in.
I got it. Thank you.
- Jessica? - Hi.
What are you doing here?
They just called me in for a little meeting. Is that a bow? That's nice.
Jessica Bard?
- Barbara. Pleasure to meet you. - You too.
Dean Brunswick just called me about you. So glad I could fit you in.
Please.
I can get another job. It won't be a problem.
I'm a college graduate.
Well, I didn't know you were a college graduate.
www.frendz4m.com
Okay.
That Happerman & Browning thing... It just wasn't meant to be.
- You know that, right? - Yeah.
It's fine.
You should eat one of these.
No, thanks.
You're turning down an Eskimo Pie?
- Mmm. - Oh, come on. All right.
Every evil, terrible thing that ever occurs in the world...
is directly offset... counterbalanced, if you will...
by the complete, utter joy of biting into an Eskimo Pie.
It's... It's the way we maintain balance in the universe.
Come on.
Mmm.
Does anyone ever say no to you?
You do all the time.
Okay. Take a bite.
Mmm. Hmm, hmm.
Mmm.
Mmm. Mmm.
Oh, yeah! It's like God's just giving birth in my mouth.
Okay. That is the girl that I fell in love with...
but harbors nothing but platonic feelings for me, unfortunately.
Y... Your foot is freezing. It's 90 degrees outside, and your foot is freezing.
My feet are always freezing. I have the feet of an 80-year-old man.
Ooh, that's hot.
Oh, so good.
Mmm.
Wait, wait. Hold... Hold on.
No.
- Yes, yes, yes. - Shh.
No!
Dad.
Juanita. Wow.
Didn't recognize you without the cash register.
Hi, Adam.
What the hell are you doing here?
Funny. I was about to ask you the same thing.
- It's my store. - Come on. Let's go.
- Sorry, Mr. Davies. - Wait, wait, wait. Actually, I'm really glad you're here.
'Cause you haven't been home for a while...
...and you definitely were not at my graduation.
Look, I don't wanna get into this with you right now.
- Come on. It's time to go. - Wait. Juanita, is he paying...
I hope he's paying you overtime for this, 'cause you do have rights.
You should call your union.
Well, welcome back home.
Bet you're excited.
Well, let's have a little look-see here.
- There she is! Hi! - Hey, Mom.
She's home!
Oh, look at that. That's just a crime. Oh!
- Welcome back, baby. - Oh, thanks, Mom.
Oh, I'm so glad you're home.
- Uh, Dad, that's gotta get into the shop. - Huh?
Uh, I'm not so sure.
- What are you doing? - I'm just looking it over. Gonna be all right.
Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You... You're not thinking about fixing this yourself, are you?
Yeah. Just have some faith in my abilities, honey.
- Usually there's a spot, if I can just hear it. - But... Dad!
- You've never fixed a car before. - Honey.
At one point, I'd never roundhouse-kicked a man in the neck before either.
Now I do it every Wednesday. My mind's like a sea sponge, honey.
When the synapses get going in Walter Malby's mind... boom, boom, boom...
It's gonna be fun. Don't worry about the car. I got it.
I got the car covered.
Let me give you a hand there, Adam. That-a-boy.
Good. Look at you. You're a self-starter.
Walter! Walter! Walter! Walter!
- Watch your step there. You should wear work gloves. - There's a derby!
There's a boxcar derby! Can we make a boxcar?
- Not now. Not now. - Pretty please? The derby's next month!
- Can we make a boxcar? - Oh, geez.
Son of a bitch. Look at that.
I knew it. Son of a bitch. Third time. Third G.D. time!
Goddamn it. That's it.
- Wait. Where are you going? - Look at this. I gotta...
- Walter, no. Don't. Honey? - Dad, come back.
What? Goddamn.
- We could go home and clean it. - No. I gotta talk to him. I'll talk to this guy.
You don't need to disturb him. I mean...
He's not home.
I know he's not working. I don't think he has a job. Goddamn it. Where is he?
Hi.
Um...
Hey. Hey. Hey.
Your cat has now crapped on my doorstep, in my yard...
and now on my driveway, which around here...
is like church to me.
- Okay? That's sanctuary. - Well...
I'm really sorry, sir. I am...
I'll talk to him. Yeah. I'll talk to him.
- See you later. - Okay.
Today you are getting a job.
Today... you're getting a job.
Today.
# What do you say #
# When people turn you away #
# Do you just turn your back #
# And quickly walk away #
# Bah, bah, bah-da-da, da, da #
# Bah, bah, bah-da-da, da #
# Bah, bah, bah-da-da, da, da #
# Bah, bah, bah-da-da, da #
The bottom line is, what I lack in experience, I make up for in vision.
And what I don't know...
I make up for with passion.
# My world, it's on fire now #
# My world is turned upside down #
# And I don't know what to do #
# Without you #
I'm driven. Full of ideas.
I'm upbeat.
Most importantly, I am incredibly enthusiastic...
About the work your company is doing.
Really? Like what?
#Don't give me a hard time ##
Hunter, I hate getting these calls.
What did I tell you about licking the kids' heads?
- Don't do it. - That's right. Ever.
- Okay? - Fine.
I mean, I know you like the way it tastes,
but some kids don't like having their heads licked.
Hey!
How'd it go?
I asked the V.P. if she was pregnant.
- No. She was just fat. - Oh. Well, that's hard sometimes.
I'm gonna call my friend Betty from high school.
She owns an indie publishing company.
I'm gonna ask her for a favor. I'm just gonna do it.
Dad already called her. Betty's dead.
- Really? - She died.
That's a shame.
What is it?
- Oh, my God. - What?
What do you guys think? This one?
Or that little mahogany number I was in earlier?
Hey, Hunter, come here.
What do you think of Grandma spending her eternal slumber in this one, huh?
I love it!
- Let's talk about casket ornamentation. - Ornamentation?
Yes. Casket ornamentation adds a personal touch many families find comforting.
And we offer a variety of custom corners and commemorative panels...
to highlight a loved one's passions.
Whatever you want, you could put it right there on your commemorative panel.
It'll be right with you through the afterlife.
I'm just not sure about all this. Thank you.
Really? What do I have to do to put you in one of my coffins today?
How about a little magnesium seepage protection system?
Whoa.
That's $18,000.
That's the exact same...
...corrosion and rust technology that protects our Alaskan pipeline.
- That's what that is. - That's $18,000.
You know, she's absolutely right.
I mean, why spend all that money...
when there's probably a nice local ditch somewhere...
you could take me to and dump me in for free?
Oh, Maureen, we'd never do that.
No, no, no, no! No!
Ooh.
Special delivery.
I got a cell phone, credit card...
student loan and, last but not least...
one more little item...
I thought you might wanna see.
- Look at that. - Mmm.
Come on!
Thanks.
Hey.
Got an idea. Since it concerns your future, I need you to pay attention.
- You listening? - No. Dad...
Listen to me. Listen to me. Ready?
Buckles.
Yeah. Belt buckles.
Million-dollar niche business. They're going crazy on the Internet.
Who do you think met a distributor, is gonna start his own company?
But, Dad, what about The Luggage Shack? They just made you regional manager.
You gotta think big picture here. You gotta have vision.
You know what I'm saying? You just gotta see the...
And since none of this other crap is really working out for you...
More than likely... gonna need a vice president.
V.P.
- You go out there and drum up some business. -
Come on. Let's go out there and put some buckles on belts. What do you say?
Are you ever gonna actually open that?
It's made a long journey from New York. I'm letting it breathe.
- You know, Adam, if you don't wanna go... - Don't give me that shit.
It's not like I'm gonna force you.
No, you're just gonna hate me if I don't.
No, I'm not gonna hate you.
I just want more for you.
Do you wanna be like me? You wanna come home from work 11:00 at night?
Save your whole life so you can afford the mortgage on a place like this?
I'm going to bed.
- Seriously, yeah. - It's a very funny thing, you know.
People keep calling me, but I'm like, " Thanks, but...
...I'm working for Happerman & Browning.
Make me a better offer, we'll talk. "
- So what are you guys doin'? - Me?
- Why, sure. - Charles Schwab, baby!
- I'm moving to San Jose... dot-com. - Oh, nice, man.
- You're going to... - Pharmacy school, next month.
- Yeah, so what are you doing? What's your deal? - I got into Columbia. We'll see.
Do it. Stay out of the workforce as long as you can.
Ryden, what about you? What are you up to?
Uh... I just...
You know, I've been interviewing.
A lot. And, um, just had some really amazing opportunities...
and just keeping my options open.
So what you're saying is you're unemployed.
God. I feel like such a loser.
Everyone is doing something with their lives...
and I just turn out to be this big, pathetic loser.
Come on.
No. I don't want your pity hug.
Come on. Ryden.
It's okay, you poor, poor, no-talent screw-up.
Oh, shut up! You can joke about it.
You already got into law school.
- So? - So, you're set. You're good. Whatever.
Yeah, maybe I'm set and I'm good, but does that mean I'm gonna be happy?
- Come here. - Screw you. I'm not going in.
You don't have to go in. Just...
come out here so I can tell you something.
- I don't think two people can be on this thing. - Quit bitching and come here.
Okay.
- Come all the way to the edge. - What?
I'm celebrating.
I'm opening at The Mint on Friday.
- You are? - Yeah.
- Shut up! Really? - Yeah.
Adam, so you're going into music then. Why don't you just say that?
Well, because I'm not saying that necessarily.
So you're going to law school?
No, I'm not saying that either necessarily.
- Then what are you saying, necessarily? - I don't know what I'm saying.
All I'm saying is that I'm opening at The Mint on Friday. Yea!
Look, you got the hard part figured out. You know what you wanna do.
Now you can just spend the rest of your life going after it.
This one's popular with all the college kids. And this one...
- No, no. - If you like 'em, you sell 'em all...
- I got plenty more... even higher quality. - That's fantastic.
- Almost unbelievable. - I am Hugo, the vampire.
- Not now, Hugo. - Then help me build my boxcar.
I'm doing business now. Doing business.
It's so lifelike. It is. That's real snake.
- All made right here in the country? - All here.
Geez, that's fantastic. I'll call you about the rest of them.
All right, buddy. Thank you. All right.
Hey, who was that guy?
Here, honey. Grab that box for me, would you?
Carry it inside. That's Gary. Gary the Buckle Man.
So these are the buckles, huh?
Yep, first shipment.
Hey. Question.
As vice president...
how would you like to spearhead the marketing campaign?
- The marketing campaign? - Yeah. You know, ads and slogans and...
you know, maybe some clever ideas for some of the buckles, like...
I don't know. What do we got here?
Look at this. Look at that one there. That could be the... like, the Cobra, you know?
Or, uh... I don't know. Here.
Look... Here. This could be the...
Uh...
It's just the flag of Delaware. I don't know.
But you know what I mean. Just some thoughts. Just ideas.
You know what I want... as vice president, Dad?
I want my car back.
I want to stop having to call a taxi every time I have to leave the house.
I told you. The part hasn't come in from the factory yet. It's... It's a curveball.
You're gonna get thrown curveballs. Life and work are like baseball.
You can't rest at the plate. You gotta keep trying.
But I am trying hard. I mean, I... I am scouring the job market.
I... I am. I'm getting up early, and I'm searching for something, anything...
to get my foot in the door.
And do you have any clue what these interviews are like?
I mean, I'm constantly having to gauge how I'm coming across...
all the while without a consistent form of transportation...
because you turned my car into your latest science project.
So I really don't need to hear that I'm not trying right now.
Well, maybe you're setting your sights too high.
Oh, really? Well, where do you think I should be setting my sights?
If you just give this one a chance, I know you're gonna love it.
You just have to open it up, get in there, check out all the pockets.
Ma'am? Sir?
It's on clearance!
Eye contact. Remember? We talked about it.
You gotta bring 'em in. Okay?
Honey, come on.
You gotta have a positive attitude if you want to sell the suitcases.
Here. Let me show you something. Hey, how you doing?
- Fine. - You headed out of town, if you don't mind me asking?
- Yeah. - Really? Where you going?
- Maui. - Oh, wow! Hawaii. That's fantastic.
You going there for business, pleasure?
- Business. - No, don't say business.
- Don't say business. Say pleasure. Who go... - Pleasure.
- Why do you ask me the question then? - I'm try... Here. Look.
Let me show you, honey. Do a little demonstration, you know, right in here.
Like this. You point at the wheels or something, you know.
- It's like, you know what? Those girls from Deal or No Deal. - Mm-hmm.
You do that. Maybe not so slutty, but show with a hand thing.
Here. Go ahead.
Remember... eye contact.
- Okay. Look at the wheels. - There you go.
- Look how they roll. Oh, it's so nice. - Yeah.
Here we go. Hot potato. Right here. Right here.
Are you in the market for some lug... Oh, crap!
- Hi. - Hi.
- I didn't know you worked here at The Luggage Shack. - I don't work here.
Uh...
I, um... It's... It's temporary.
Right.
Um, how's Happerman & Browning?
Uh, great. Really, really great.
They're sending me to New York next week for a conference.
- Hence the need for a new briefcase. - Sounds so great.
Yeah, I saw one over here last week that I loved.
- Let me take a look at that black one. - Up there?
- Mm-hmm. - Yeah. Um...
There we go.
Ah... You know what? I want to take a look at the one right next to it.
Nope. I gotta trust my instincts on this one.
I'm saying no to that one. I'm going back to the original.
You know, things are moving outlandishly quick for me right now.
Unbelievably fast.
I'll need a good team. I need people around me I can trust.
This is a no.
Let me take a look at this gray one here.
I thought you wanted a briefcase.
- I'm gonna need both. - Mm-hmm.
- Lot of traveling. - Right.
Okay.
That's the one.
You know, Ryden, I think we've got really good synergy, you and I.
I know you're in a tough place right now...
but I want you to remember that struggle and strife come before success.
Even in the dictionary.
I'm not gonna take this one. Can I see that black one up there?
You know what?
Dad! All yours!
Hunty, can't ride Mama's shoe when she's trying to make waffles.
- Giddyap. - Come on, honey.
Go play. Go.
- Ride like the wind. - Honey.
What do you want, Maureen? What?
- Hunter is a very unique little boy. - I don't want you to coddle him.
I am not coddling him, okay? I'm just a little concerned...
that he's weird.
Well, of course he's weird!
He's a Malby. Weird is good.
Weird indicates a creative force.
You have no idea what I go through, okay? Trust me.
- Hey, come on. I wanna show you something. Come on. - Huh?
# Bum, bum, bum, bum #
# Bum, bum, bum, bum bum, bum, bum, bum #
It is time.
# Bum, bum, bum, bum #
# Bum, bum #
# Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum #
#Bum #
# Bum #
# Bum, bum, bum bum, bum, bum, bum #
# Bum, bum, bum, bum #
No way.
- It's really fixed? - Yeah.
Yeah, man. Your dad doesn't jerk around.
Ooh.
Watch this. Crack this hood. Take a look at this.
- Now I'm gonna go fire her up. - Okay.
Look under the engine and let me know what happens.
I wasn't happy with the timing, so I tweaked it a little bit.
Think I got her where I like her.
- Ready? - Yeah.
Ah, it's great! Hey!
Just a little bit more. It's...
Whoa!
Oh!
It just isn't fair.
There you are, this poor, little, innocent thing that wouldn't hurt a fly...
and then one day you're murdered by my own son.
It was an accident. Geez.
Why didn't you tell me to look behind me?
What? How is this my fault?
Hon, you always have to keep your eyes open. Scanning. Constantly scanning.
- You told me to look at the engine. - Can't do two things at once?
This is ridiculous. You... You hated that cat.
- Shh. Keep your voice down. - You did say something about wanting to flatten the cat.
Okay, okay. All right. Fine.
- It was a goddamn accident. - Either way, somebody has to tell the neighbor.
All right. Geez. I can't believe...
Look out. Look out. Oh, God.
God... Jesus. Goddamn. Even in death! Jesus!
- Ryden, go with him. - What? No!
Come on, honey. Look at him.
Mmm, all right.
- Oh, no, honey, don't do that. - Oh, Hunter, don't do that. No, no.
Dad!
- What? - Why would you do that?
- Do what? - That knock.
- What? - Of all the knocks, that one?
That one is the one you think best says, "Sorry we killed your cat"?
"Of all the knocks"?
What do you mean, "Of all the knocks"? How many knocks do you think there are?
No, seriously. How many knocks do you think there are?
- Let's just make this brief, okay? - All right.
Cat's dead.
Ran over him on accident.
We're really sorry. Um...
- We didn't mean for it to happen. - Where is he?
- #Midnight # - Part.
- #Not a sound from the pavement # - Let's part the way. Please.
# Has the moon lost her memory #
#She is smiling alone #
# In the lamplight #
- #T he withered leaves collect at my feet # - There.
- What is that? - #A nd the wind #
# Begins to moan #
# Memory #
#All alone in the moonlight #
# I can smile at the old days #
- There. All right. - #I was beautiful then #
- There. - #I remember#
- Ooh, sorry. - #T he time I knew #
#What happiness was #
- # Let the memory # - Honey?
- #L ive again # - All right. All right.
# Every streetlamp #
#Seems to beat #
#Afatalistic #
#Warning #
Well, I gotta roll.
- So, uh, if you need anything... - Come on. Up. Up.
- here's my card. - That-a-boy.
Okay? Okeydokey.
Hey.
Listen, I'm really sorry about all this.
I... Well, I can't tell you how sorry I am, I mean...
about your poor cat and this...
Do you want some breakfast?
- What, right now? - Yeah.
It's almost dinnertime.
Best time for pancakes. Do you like pancakes?
- One more? - No, I'm good, thanks. I'm full.
- Do you not like my pancakes? - I love your pancakes, but I'm stuffed.
- All right. - All right.
All right.
No, no, no, no. You go sit.
- Don't worry. I'll take care of it. - Okay.
- Yeah, yeah. - Thanks.
You know, it's weird. I've never seen the inside of this house before.
Yeah. Kind of unimpressive, isn't it?
No, it looks exactly like ours, actually.
- Except you have cooler stuff. - Yeah, yeah. I direct infomercials.
So I end up taking everything home.
Like this. What is this?
- This? - Yeah.
Well, a couch.
- That's a couch? - Yeah.
www.frendz4m.com
Uno, dos, tres, cuatro...
cinco.
Ah.
Super light.
And can even be used as a flotation device in case of a flood.
Let's see. I, um... I have no car...
I, uh, lost my job peddling luggage...
- and I now live with my parents. - All right. Living the dream.
- Yeah. - That's great.
Yeah, this whole postgraduation thing...
is not exactly turning out the way I planned.
I just thought I'd be doing something amazing by now.
Or at least doing something.
Right. Hmm.
Well, listen.
I know it doesn't solve the problem, but if you need something temporary...
we could always use an extra P.A. on set.
You know, the hours are crap, and the money is very, very bad, but...
it will get you out of the house.
Yeah. Yeah, that would be good.
- You got a job. - Thanks.
Cool.
But now...
I think it's time for you...
to start thinking about the good things.
Yeah.
- Like what? - Like...
your ears.
- Ears? - Yeah.
- My ears? - Yeah, you've got incredible ears.
Incredible?
Yeah.
You know how some people have that... that droop...
that sort of tragic dangling earlobe thing?
Yours... not so, no.
Not a single...
Just don't know why you had to give him those cookies.
- We'll buy more cookies. - You know they're my favorites.
Hey.
- Where's Ryden? - She's paying her condolences.